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Parenting

Anger Management Tips for Parents: How to Handle Anger in Parenting


Anger Management Tips for Parents: How to Handle Anger in Parenting

The Parenting Junkie discusses anger in parenting. Do you ever get angry with your kids? If so, this video has some anger management tips for parents. If you are trying to parent without yelling and to learn how to stay calm you’ll learn 3 calm parenting strategies to get you through without yelling the next time you feel angry with your child. Parenting without yelling is a goal we all have, we want to practice calm parenting but sometimes our anger can get the best of us. That’s why these calm parenting strategies will help you with how to handle your anger towards a child. Using the anger management for moms you’ll learn in this video you’ll learn how to manage anger towards a child. As you implement these strategies you’ll notice yourself handling your anger in a more productive and peaceful way.

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RECOMMEND TO WATCH / LISTEN TO NEXT:
► How to Teach Kids Respect in 3 Simple Steps (https://youtu.be/QgftkxhcMnA)
► Adult Tantrums: Is Yelling at Our Kids Effective (https://youtu.be/JdHsiWeZq6s)
► Handling Tantrums with Dr. Laura Markham (https://youtu.be/mQrqRaNIA5g)
► Your Child HIT You? (https://youtu.be/OYwIG3nmYGQ)

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Parenting

From sex to money: the eight deep discussions that can save a dying relationship

John and Julie Gottman have devised dates for ailing couples – but how many are ready for this level of openness and sincerity?

How often do we really talk to our partners? About the big stuff, not about childcare arrangements, or what the funny noise coming from the fridge means? According to a study at the University of California, Los Angeles, couples with small children, and who both have careers, talk for just 35 minutes a week, and mainly about errands. That study, says John Gottman, “alarmed” him and his wife, Julie. “It seemed like couples who had been together a long time were not taking care of the relationship – their curiosity in one another had died,” he says.

Gottman, the renowned relationships researcher known for his work on divorce predictors, and Julie Schwartz Gottman, a psychologist, have been married for 32 years. They founded the Gottman Institute, which conducts research and trains therapists. Their Gottman method is an approach designed to repair and deepen relationships, concentrating on three main areas – “friendship, conflict management and creation of shared meaning”. They have also written many books, together and separately. Their latest book, which they wrote as a couple, is Eight Dates. It guides couples through eight conversations – to have on dedicated dates – on the big issues such as sex, parenting and how to handle conflict. It was partly sparked by the rise of online dating and to provide new couples with a roadmap to navigate tricky subjects, but mainly to give long-term couples a project to steer their relationship to a better place. “Couples who have been together for quite a long time create a relationship that grows stale with time, and they lose track of one another,” says Julie. “People evolve over time. They change.”

Continue reading…

Read more: theguardian.com

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Parenting

How to Teach Kids Respect in 3 Simple Steps!


How to Teach Kids Respect in 3 Simple Steps!

The Parenting Junkie teaches how to teach kids respect. With peaceful parenting it can seem like if we don’t demand respect from our children they will never learn how to respect us as parents. A parent wrote to me recently and said, “I totally believe in peaceful and respectful parenting but I feel as though I’m letting them disrespect me. It says in the Bible obey thy father and thy mother and here I am letting them disobey me. I worry that I’m raising kids who are disrespectful. Some parents believe respect means our children follow our every whim (see my take on that in the recommended videos below). Teaching kids respect can seem like a daunting task but when we flip our mindset about it you will see that teaching children respect is simple but like anything on the peaceful parenting journey it requires we also look in the mirror. Your children are learning respect through watching you. How are you showing respect? If we don’t demand obedience and respect will our kids be respectful?

[3:00] – Respect thy father and thy mother
3 Ways to raise kids who are respectful
[4:21] #1 – Respect Your Elders
[5:20] #2 – Respect Your Youngers
[6:45] #3 – Respect Yourself
[7:39] – How to respond when your child is disrespectful
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RECOMMEND TO WATCH / LISTEN TO NEXT:
► Do Reward Systems Work? (https://youtu.be/9EKlFXaCtYA)
► How Can I Get my Kid to do Chores (https://youtu.be/f-agVk8Oyt0)
► How to Raise a Child with Manners (https://youtu.be/1vOjPOLtYeU)
► Podcast: How Our Children Actually Learn (https://www.theparentingjunkie.com/podcast_type/how-your-children-actually-learn-surprising-uncomfortable-%f0%9f%a4%af/)

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Parenting

I’m outwardly very successful, but I can’t cope with my life | Dear Mariella

Stop and work out what you want from your short time on the planet, says Mariella Frostrup. It’s time to put your incredible energy into your own wellbeing

The dilemma I have a lovely husband, two gorgeous girls, a lovely home and a high-flying job. However, I cry every night because I hate myself. My inability to cope with pressure – financial, intellectual and emotional – horrifies me. I see others dealing with genuine problems and don’t understand why, with my myriad advantages, I cannot manage mine. My husband thinks I was over-praised as a child and am always chasing an unattainable A grade. My work is high-stress, involving huge budgets. Separately, five years ago I lost a baby in utero – a hugely painful experience. I fear stopping work would damage my daughters and place a large burden on my husband. But seeing our girls for less than an hour a day is miserable. I think I may be depressed, but admitting it may mean my children are taken away and I’ll lose my job and ruin my family.

Mariella replies You’ve got a lively imagination. I can assure you that depression, if that’s part of the issue, would not mean your children being taken away. It’s a diagnosis in expectation of a cure, not a condition from which, once identified, all will unravel. As parents, if we were to be deemed inadequate the moment life started getting us down, there would be few if any children not being swept into care. You might be surprised to hear how many people there are, in every walk of life, struggling with issues of self-esteem and depression. A happy life is not necessarily made up of the ingredients we’re told are imperative, and that disappointment lies at the heart of many a current malaise.

Continue reading…

Read more: theguardian.com

Categories
Parenting

Considering Free Range Parenting? Do the Benefits Outweigh the Risks!?


Considering Free Range Parenting? Do the Benefits Outweigh the Risks!?

The Parenting Junkie discusses free range parenting. What is free-range parenting? How are free range kids different from kids that grow up with helicopter parents? In this video you’ll learn why choosings to be a free range family is a great choice. When kids are allowed to be free-range kids the freedom and independence they gain allows them to grow into competent adults. In addition, research suggests that free range children grow up to be less anxious and depressed (who doesn’t want that?). In the book, How to Raise an Adult by Julie Lythcott-Haims, she writes that she has met parents who would not allow their 17 year old daughter to take the subway. Interested in resources to help you learn the real risks of free range parenting? Checkout Let Grow (letgrow.org) founded by Lenore Senazy with resources such as the laws, groups interested in raising free range children, etc. Also, if you are looking for resources to help teach your children to be safe (ie teach about tricky people instead of stranger danger) checkout safely ever after founded by Pattie Fitzgerald.

What to do to become more trusting and free-range with your children:
#1- Limit fear mongering & sensationalist news [6:31]
#2 – Switch from Stranger Danger to Tricky People [9:22]
#3 – Find Ways to Allow Freedom [12:49]

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RECOMMEND TO WATCH / LISTEN TO NEXT:
► How Can I Get My Kids to do Chores (https://youtu.be/f-agVk8Oyt0)
► Why Kids Need Risky Play (https://youtu.be/smEwpYRPA08)
► Allowance and Chores? (https://youtu.be/36NOM0FAhbc)
► The Danger of Safety (https://youtu.be/-azMKn62nfY)

RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THE VIDEO
How to Raise an Adult by Julie Lythcott-Haims (https://amzn.to/2KTPUzf)
Free-Range Kids, How to Raise Safe, Self-Reliant Children by Lenore Skenazy (https://amzn.to/2Nw42k7)
Let Grow (https://letgrow.org/)
Super Duper Safety School: Safety Rules for Kids & Grown-Ups by Pattie Fitzgerald (https://amzn.to/2HrPNcd)
Safely Ever After (https://www.safelyeverafter.com/)

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Categories
Parenting

All my friends have had babies and I feel marginalised | Dear Mariella

It’s hard when you don’t move in unison with your peers. It doesn’t mean abandoning friendships, says Mariella Frostrup, but don’t be afraid to keep a distance when needed

The dilemma I’m 34 and have been in a close friendship group with four other women since university. Our relationship has been a constant comfort, but during the past year I’ve found it incredibly difficult to connect with them as all four have had babies. Suddenly our WhatsApp group looks more like Mumsnet – and I just can’t relate. I don’t know if I want kids or not. My husband puts no pressure on me, but this is bringing out the worst in me. I feel left behind, confused and judgmental as these friends enter motherhood. I feel isolated and incapable of contributing, and when I do I feel disingenuous. I try to widen the conversation, but it always reverts back to babies. I don’t want to lose these people, but I feel marginalised, as if I’m fundamentally missing out on some intensely female purpose. How do I step back without being overly dramatic?

Mariella replies It’s definitely a problem. I am sympathetic. But stick with me first, because I have to draw attention to how emotionally over-sensitised we’ve become as a species. Growing up, friends shacking up before we do, marriages and divorce, babies born and infidelities committed – they’re all part of life’s rich pageant. Some are profoundly upsetting, some manageably so, and others so natural a part of life’s flow that they should barely bother us at all. Some of these emotional traumas are dumped on us, some committed by us and some are not directed at us at all. In the latter case, it’s generally our own unresolved issues that make us vulnerable to being wounded.

Continue reading…

Read more: theguardian.com

Categories
Parenting

Why Kids Need Risky Play (and how to feel safe encouraging it!)


Why Kids Need Risky Play (and how to feel safe encouraging it!)

The Parenting Junkie illustrates the importance of risky play. In this video you’ll learn why you need to let kids take risks and the benefits of risk taking in early childhood. The importance of risky play and adventurous play cannot be understated. Kids need to have risk in play in order to develop properly. This can seem daunting so you’ll also learn how to encourage risky play and still feel safe. In her book Balanced and Barefoot, Angela Hanscom points out the detriments this lack of play causes for our children. Luckily enough research has been done that there are more risky playgrounds being built for children such as the adventure playgrounds you’ll see footage of in this video. In addition to learning the benefits of risky play, you’ll learn the 6 categories of risky play by Peter Gray author of Free to Learn. After watching this you’ll feel much more comfortable allowing your children the unstructured play and risky play they need.

How to Help Your Children Take Meaningful and Reasonable Risks:
#1 – Stop Saying Be Careful [7:34]
#2 – Keep Your Own Feelings in Check [9:38]
#3 – Seek Opportunities for Risky Play [10:29]

6 Categories of Risky Play
1. Great Heights [11:05]
2. Rapid Speeds [11:34]
3. Dangerous Tools [11:56]
4. Dangerous Elements [12:52]
5. Rough and Tumble [13:24]
6. Disappearing/Getting Lost [14:21]

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RECOMMEND TO WATCH / LISTEN TO NEXT:
► The Play Toddlers Need (https://youtu.be/hHzSj0eMbwM)
► The Danger of Safety (https://youtu.be/-azMKn62nfY)
► What to Do When Another Child Hits Yours (https://youtu.be/99wv6wJc_lE)
► Disadvantages of Competitive Sports for Kids (https://youtu.be/ZfSuQ4nyDxI)

RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THE VIDEO
Balanced and Barefoot by Angela Hanscom (https://amzn.to/2ZdMsUd)
Free to Learn by Peter Gray (https://amzn.to/2Zcqa5o)
Knives for Kids (https://amzn.to/2ZmAZ9a)
Playful Parenting by Lawrence Cohen (https://amzn.to/2YYoAIQ)

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Categories
Parenting

Which tablet to buy for your kid: These are the best right now

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Kids are device-hungry nuts these days. Seriously, WTF happened to Sesame Street and a book before bedtime? But we digress.

Technology has changed a lot since you were small. Your kids have probably mastered the features on your iPhone better than you have due to constantly asking to play with it. And when you do eventually get it back, it’s a sticky mess covered in slobber and other unexplainable slimes. But in the age of touch screens and constant connectivity, there’s not really a way to say “no” without feeling like a parent from the dark ages. Even the animals in Zootopia have smartphones. (Seriously.) Read more…

More about Ipad, Tablets, Parenting, Fire Tablet, and Mashable Shopping


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IMAGE: Amazon

BEST COMBO OF SPECS AND KIDS' CONTENT

Amazon Fire HD 8 Kids Edition Tablet

Amazon has outdone themselves with an ultra durable version of the Fire HD Tablet that can take whatever kids throw at it.

Resolution: 1280 x 800

Storage: 32 GB

Battery life: 12 hours


$129.99 from Amazon


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IMAGE: Amazon

BEST FOR TEENAGERS

9.7-inch iPad

Apple's most affordable option has computer-like features and will likely last for your kid's whole school career.

Storage: 32 GB, 128 GB

Resolution: 2048 x 1536

Battery life: 10 hours


$249 from Amazon


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IMAGE: Amazon

MOST DURABLE

Amazon Fire 7 Kids Edition Tablet

Energetic kids are no match for the new Fire 7's improved protective case and Amazon's worry-free guarantee.

Resolution: 1024 x 600

Storage: 16 GB

Battery life: 7 hours


$99.99 from Amazon


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IMAGE: Amazon

BEST IPAD FOR FAMILIES TO SHARE

iPad Air

Consider it the diet iPad Pro: The 2019 Air is speedy and packed with power that lasts all day.

Storage: 64 GB, 256 GB

Battery life: 10 hours

Resolution: 1920 x 1080


$499 from Amazon


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IMAGE: Amazon

BEST ANDROID TABLET FOR FAMILIES TO SHARE

Samsung Galaxy Tab A 10.1

Kids will love the interactive learning in Kids Mode and parents will love having a totally separate interface.

Storage: 32 GB, 64 GB, 128 GB

Resolution: 1920 x 1200

Battery life: 10 hours


$229.99 from Amazon


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IMAGE: Amazon

BEST FOR INTERNET SAFETY

Samsung Galaxy Tab E Lite Kids Edition

Ideal for parents who want to watch kids' behavior like a hawk, *without* the kids feeling restricted.

Storage: 8 GB

Resolution: 1024 x 600

Battery life: 9 hours


$127.99 from Amazon


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IMAGE: Amazon

BEST FOR PRESCHOOL AGED KIDS

LeapFrog LeapPad Ultimate

Large icons, specially curated-for-kids internet access, and a shatterproof screen makes this great for kids 6 and under.

Storage: 8 GB

Resolution: 1024 x 600

Battery life: 5 hours


$99.99 from Amazon


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IMAGE: Walmart

BUDGET PICK

Kurio Xtreme Next Tablet

A decent amount of pre-downloaded content and parental controls for balling on a budget.

Storage: 16 GB

Resolution: 1024 x 600

Battery life: 6 hours


$79 from Walmart

Read more: mashable.com

Categories
Parenting

What do Reward Systems Really Teach? Do they Actually Work?


What do Reward Systems Really Teach? Do they Actually Work?

The Parenting Junkie uses summer reading reward systems to illustrate what reward systems teach. You may be wondering how to use reward systems, especially trying to use reward systems for homework or reward systems for toddlers, but according to Alfie Kohn author of Unconditional Parenting, punishment and rewards are two sides of the same coin. So when contemplating using sticker charts as a reward system you need to ask yourself, do reward systems work. Unfortunately, as you’ll learn in this video, reward systems don’t work, at least in truly changing the behavior. So when you are trying to encourage your child to read think of other ways besides reward systems for reading or summer reading rewards. This video will show you what to do instead of using a reward system.

1:40 – Rewards impede values
3:25 – Rewards impeded achievement
5:26 – Set goals together
7:45 – Show appreciation
8:19 – Encouragement and celebration

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RECOMMEND TO WATCH / LISTEN TO NEXT:
► Dr. Shefali Tsabary on Education (https://youtu.be/NF46uJUGEGI)
► Child-Led Learning (https://youtu.be/P0Vn1RrqT8k)
► 10 Parenting Practices to Stop (https://youtu.be/zjdkIeFxdRo)
► Unschooling Daily Routine (https://youtu.be/oyKIIPc6r8c)

RESOURCES SHOWN IN THE VIDEO
Alfie Kohn: Punished by Rewards (https://amzn.to/2yznbsQ)

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Disadvantages of Sports for Kids and How to Bring Back the FUN!!


Disadvantages of Sports for Kids and How to Bring Back the FUN!!

The Parenting Junkie illustrates the disadvantages of sports, specifically the disadvantages of sports for kids. In this video you’ll learn about the harmful effects of competition as well as problems with competition. Instead of focusing on competition and competitive sports you’ll see that there can be fun in sports when we leave it up to our children to decide. The problem with competition is that it focuses on winning and winning only. The flip side is the theory where everybody wins. Neither of which really help teach our children. In order to bring back fun in sports we need to make sports fun by allowing children to create their own pick-up games. In this video you’ll see the problem with organized sports is that they focus on competition for kids, this will show you what to do instead. By the end of this video you’ll understand why competitive sports at a young age is harmful and how to make sports fun again.

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► How Can I Get My Kid to do Chores (https://youtu.be/f-agVk8Oyt0)
► Child-Led Learning (https://youtu.be/P0Vn1RrqT8k)
► 10 Parenting Practices to Stop (https://youtu.be/zjdkIeFxdRo)

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